Boardgames make smiles. Smiles make friends.
So you’ve decided you want to use boardgaming as your ticket to a rewarding social life and sense of community. Congratulations and welcome! Allow me to punch that ticket and show you to your seat. This article is your guide for getting started.
By DAREN STEBNER
Boardgames are the new social networking platform, but if you don’t already know people who play, then you may not have a notion of how to get started. For the record, jumping in by buying the game with the coolest box and then inviting your friends over to give it a try is unlikely to result in success. That’s like stepping blindly off of a river bank. Sure, you might end up planting your foot onto a conveniently located stone, but you’re more likely to end up in the drink. I’ve gotten soaked several times and can assure you it’s demoralizing and doesn’t engender your victims into wanting to repeat the experiment.
The best way to get into boardgaming is to fall in with a group who is already doing it. If you’re lucky enough to have friends who boardgame, you’re sitting pretty. But if not, then you you’ll need to find those people.
As an introvert I had a number of acquaintances and very few friends, none of whom were into boardgaming or interested in starting. So I didn’t have anyone to help introduce me to the boardgaming scene. I didn’t even know a “scene” existed. All I knew was that I needed to find a way to meet like-minded people, but how to do that as an introvert was a mystery, and I had no choice but to figure it out on my own. While talking to a game store employee about my problem one day, they suggested Meetup.com. I had been vaguely aware of Meetup, but had always assumed it was some kind of dating site and never bothered to check it out. It isn’t. Full disclosure: I have no financial interest in, do not know anyone affiliated with, and am not myself affiliated in any way with Meetup. If it was a publicly traded company I would own stocks, believe me, but unfortunately it isn’t. It’s just that it turns out to be the perfect tool for my purposes and I’m sure it will be for yours as well.
Meetup.com is a website (and app) that helps people with common interests find each other and organize times and places to pursue those interests together. Yes, this is a social networking tool, but it’s a social networking tool deliberately designed for the purpose of getting people away from their screens and bringing them together in real life.
Each meetup group has a distinct and searchable name that indicates its primary focus. You like knitting? You’re into hiking? You’re looking for a support group? It’s all there. It’s kind of amazing, and it actually works, as long as you can get yourself over the initial hump of going to your first one (which is what I’ll be helping you with here). Point your browser at www.meetup.com or download the Meetup app and search for “games” or “boardgames” in your area. Provided you’re in a moderately populous spot you should get some hits. You don’t even have to create an account. You can just search and lurk if you want. Where I am there are five or six different groups catering to different tastes just within the boardgaming community. And through Meetup I was utterly astounded to learn that there were several thousand people in my city involved in boardgaming. How I didn’t already know that was beyond me – especially as I had a latent interest in the hobby – but I suppose it’s because they’re a pretty low-key bunch. Evidently they move among us, passing undetected as perfectly ordinary human beings.
I lurked online for weeks trying to get up the nerve to attend a meetup and approach a group of total strangers. I had a pretty good inkling that I would enjoy it – provided the people already in the group weren’t weird. It feels strange saying that now, but there is definitely a stereotype that pops into people’s heads when the word “boardgamer” is mentioned (lives in parent’s basement, doesn’t bathe, poor social skills, etc.), and even though I felt like this was a hobby I could enjoy and use to create a social life for myself, I was still uneasy about the kinds of people I thought I might encounter.
For my first meetup I finally selected a game night at a pub. I like a laid-back pub atmosphere and figured that if the meetup was a bust, I could at least enjoy a beer. That seemed like a reasonable consolation prize for making the effort.
When you decide you’ve found that first group and event that you would like to try out, here’s what I recommend you do next:
Taking the above steps will really help to smooth your entry into the meetup. First, you will have already acquainted yourself with at least one person who is going to be there. Second, you’ll have seen the photos of everyone who is attending and may even be able to remember some names. Third, you’ll know who the host is and will know who to find when you do get there. Fourth, since you introduced yourself and perhaps even conversed with some people, you’ll be far more comfortable than simply walking into the event cold. For someone who is shy or introverted, or otherwise prone to avoiding other people on the flimsiest of excuses, having all of the above things working in your favour beforehand will be a strong bulwark against those excuses. And don’t worry, for boardgaming groups there is quite literally zero pressure to prepare anything in advance. Preparing for boardgaming consists of: a) getting dressed, and b) showing up. There may even be naked boardgaming groups out there that make this a full 50% less onerous.
I cannot emphasize strongly enough when you’re new to this how important it is to show up on time. DO NOT arrive fashionably late unless you can’t avoid it. There are two reasons for this. The first is that when you arrive you want to find the event host and it will be best to do this before people have already committed to playing specific games with specific people. The job of the event host among other things is to welcome, orient, and introduce new people and generally ensure the best chance of their having a good time and coming back. They will be happy to chat with you to get an understanding of your experience and interests and then will get you into a game and group of people that will be a good fit. That’s a great way to start.
The second reason you want to be sure you arrive on time is the flip side of that coin. If everyone is already seated and engaged in a game when you arrive, you may be left standing around, feeling awkward and unsure of what to do. If this does happen, then your first task should absolutely be to find the host and introduce yourself. They will help you to get started, depending on what is appropriate for the circumstances – although you may have to wait to be able to play something. If the host can break away, they may simply offer to play a two player game with you until other opportunities open up.
But having said all that… just show up on time. It’s so much easier.
Before a boardgaming event gets down to business, there is typically a period of time at the beginning of the event where people mill around and chat about what it is they feel like playing. This is the ideal time for you to be there, because nothing has yet been settled. It’s fluid and dynamic as people discuss preferences and moods. But at about the 10-minute mark an invisible force suddenly intercedes, final decisions get made, and everyone breaks off into groups and begins their selected games.
If it’s your first time to a meetup or you really don’t know anyone yet, then, again, unless you’re self-confident and/or gregarious, your best strategy is to find the host, full stop. The host will help you get into a game and thereby help you meet people, which will make it easier to get into the next game and consequently easier to come to the next event. That’s very important.
In general at any event, however, you should stay standing in proximity to these conversations and at least actively listening if not participating. That will provide the opportunity to be noticed and invited in. Some new people make the mistake of sitting down, which I’ve realized is a huge no-no. Couples, I’ve noticed, are particularly prone to doing this. Sitting down signals that you’re settled, and that you’re uninterested in the ongoing conversations. This isn’t a boardgamer thing; it’s just body language. It’s not what a new person intends to convey, but it does definitely have the effect of taking you off of everyone’s radar and drastically reducing your chance of engaging more fully in the activities of the group. It’s very much like folding your arms across your chest. And if you’re doing that as well then you’re really doubling down on a disappointing experience.
Of all of the people I’ve seen come to boardgaming events, the ones I’ve seen engage and enjoy themselves the least successfully tend to be couples (that is, pairs of significant others or conjoined friends). I think there are a few of reasons for this, stemming from the fact that couples tend to want to stick together. That is completely understandable, but it can get in the way of an enjoyable time, and I’ve seen some couples leave early, having not found the hoped-for experience. Following are the things I’ve observed that you will want to bear in mind.
First, one person can usually be accommodated quite easily in a game that is starting up, whereas sometimes there isn’t room for two. This will limit a couple’s options in terms of the games they can play if they insist on playing together. There may be several well-liked games starting that can only accommodate one more person each, and there may be a less liked game starting that (not surprisingly) is casting around for two or three more people. Guess what your odds of a good time are then? Related to this, if you’re not flexible about splitting up to play different games, then it may lead to the other participants shrugging their shoulders after making an effort to include you, and you ultimately being left with no one but each other as games get started without you. You could have stayed home for that experience.
Second, if you do get into a game, and if you are the sort of couple that refuses to “go against” one another in a game that is supposed to be competitive (or if you work only with each other in a game that is supposed to be cooperative), then the other players could feel their gameplay experience is being compromised. Couples like this are sometimes referred to as the dreaded “two-headed opponent”. You may think this point is more about others’ enjoyment of the game rather than yours, but I guarantee your gaming experience will not be what it should or could be, owing partly to strategies (or even attitudes) the other players may feel they need to employ in order to counter your defacto alliance. Moreover, if you play this way there will be reluctance on the part of the other players to engage with you as a couple in future games, thus eventually souring your experience. This is about fairness, and about treating all participants in a game with the same consideration.
Third, as I mentioned earlier, couples tend to sit down at a table when they arrive. This may be an appropriate convention at a restaurant, but not at a gaming event. Help yourself and stand up, even if you don’t talk. If you remain standing, then you are signalling your availability for a game, making it very likely you will be asked if you want to join one even if you are silent.
But wait! There are several benefits to arriving at a gaming event as a couple if you are willing to (temporarily) split up, some of which are the obvious counter-points to the things I describe above. But also:
It is so much harder to step out of your comfort zone to meet new people and try new things when you’re leaning on each other. Use your mutual support to get yourselves to an event, but once you’ve arrived be flexible and allow some distance. You will find it a much more rewarding and enjoyable experience.
Walking into a place you’ve never been before and introducing yourself to a group of strangers is a big deal for most of us. It’s intimidating and it can take some serious gumption to do it. Your inner monologue might go something like this, in increasingly shrill tones. If you followed the steps I outlined above when selecting your first meetup event, then the shrillness should be noticeably suppressed:
“It’s going to be a roomful of strangers, I don’t know what to expect. And it’ll be a culture I’m totally unfamiliar with. Are there protocols? Should I know something already? Are they going to be snide or dismissive or maybe ignore me? Oh good lord, what if they’re all super-geeks and I can’t connect with them at all? I have no idea what I’m doing and I don’t know anything about boardgames. This could be really uncomfortable!”
Let me put your mind at ease about all of that self-defeating nonsense right now. In Part I of this article I explained that boardgaming was inclusive, and here’s where that comes in. Those who play boardgames are just generally nice people. Yes, some can seem a little socially awkward, but mostly they’re just regular Jane’s and Joe’s. Informal polling suggests that they are unanimously human beings with different strengths and frailties like you and me. What everyone will have in common is that they’re involved in the hobby because they want to be with other people doing something fun and worthwhile. And they all started out right where you are now.
What I’ve found is that boardgamers, by and large, are a welcoming bunch that works on a “pay it forward” basis. Every boardgamer was taught games by someone else, so they’re happy to pay those favours forward by teaching others. It’s how the hobby grows and that’s good for everyone involved. Here’s how my first experience showing up at that pub meetup event went:
Me: Hi, I’m Daren. This is my first time here…
Total stranger: Hi Daren, welcome to the group. I’m Graham. This is Nathaniel and Sammy.
[handshakes and hellos all around]
Me: What game is this?
Graham: It’s Ra.
Me: Mind if I watch?
Graham: Well, we’re just starting. You wanna play?
Me: Uh, well, I don’t know the rules…
Graham: No problem, we’ll teach you. Have a seat.
And I haven’t looked back. It was really that easy, and all of my fretting and worrying had been a pointless waste of energy.
Here’s a helpful tip for breaking the ice when you’re with strangers. When there is dead air, thrust your hand out and say (loudly enough to get their attention): “Hi, we haven’t met yet. I’m [your name here].” The effect of that action and those words when standing next to a total stranger is like actual magic as the person’s face turns from stony to smiling and they reach toward your hand. Suddenly that ice is broken and natural conversation can begin – you have an obvious mutual interest, after all. “I saw you last time, but didn’t get a chance to meet you.” “Have you been doing this long?” “What sort of games do you like?” “Oh, yeah? I’ve heard about that one. What makes it so good/bad?” Etcetera. After the handshake and introduction it’s easy. Frequently at gaming events I’ll find myself milling around between games next to someone I’ve never met. Most people don’t seem to have a way to break that ice, so they just stand there silently, eyes darting around the room attempting to look busy. I can’t stand occupying the same space as someone else while they pretend I don’t exist, so it’s usually me that sticks out my hand first. I’m always glad I did – and so are they. It’s so simple and takes so little effort. Make it your habit, too.
By the same token, when you sit down to play a game introduce yourself to players you haven’t met – or otherwise ensure that everyone there has been properly introduced. Without that introduction your interactions during the game could be tinged with some awkwardness, so get it out of the way at the beginning or at the first opportunity. Just make it a sort of personal protocol. And if you forget someone’s name, never feel embarrassed about asking them what it is again – even ten seconds later. Ninety-five percent of the time they’ve forgotten yours as well and will be glad to have the reciprocal opportunity to hear yours again, too.
There are many things you can and will get out of boardgaming. First there is the obvious social and entertainment aspect of it – you’ll meet people, make friends, and have a pleasant way to spend your time. For me it’s bigger than that – I feel like I’m a part of something, which is really comforting. But there is also something that I hadn’t expected, although should have.
You can, if you wish, use boardgaming as a zero-risk way to build skills. It’s going to happen anyway, just by becoming familiar with certain games and learning how to play them well. But if you choose to, you can target your gaming such that you get better at particular things. For example, I’m terrible at strategy – in life as well as in games. But if I wanted to get better at strategy in life, playing strategy-based games would be a great way to do it. If you fail at whatever it is you’re trying to achieve in a given game… oh well. Get on that horse and try again and again, until things start to click for you and you start imperceptibly to think in a new way. Learning strategy in a game is just as valid as learning strategy through experiences in real life. The same intellectual faculties come into play, so to speak – recognizing patterns, making plans, skillfully influencing or coordinating disparate elements and events under your control in order to achieve a goal. It’s all there in boardgames if you want it.
Besides strategy, other things you could teach yourself using the medium of boardgames are negotiation, tactics, calculation, reading people (social deduction), problem solving, spatial reasoning, memory, and even lying if you want.
Recently I heard someone say “It’s easier to find new boardgamer friends than it is to turn your existing friends into boardgamers.” In my case that was certainly true and looking back a few years I wish I had something like this article to help point me in the right direction. Hopefully it has given you the direction I didn’t have, and given you the push or the confidence you need to reach out to a gaming group in your area.The world of boardgaming and its benefits await you. The sooner you get involved, the sooner you’ll wonder why you waited. There is probably already a community in your town that’s there to receive you – remember, in my experience and others I’ve spoken with, boardgamers are a welcoming and inclusive bunch. But if there is no ready-made group for you, then consider creating your own Meetup group. Chances are good you’re not the only one in your area wishing there was such a thing, and you may be astonished at its potential for gathering momentum. However you choose to go about it, get out there and get gaming. Only good things will come of it.
If the mention of boardgames makes you wince with thoughts of Monopoly, Clue, and Risk then this article is for you. Since those days boardgames have grown up. They’ve thundered out of their parents’ basements with talk of changing the world, and now they’re calling home with tales of adventure, cheer, and community. It’s time to have another look at what modern boardgames have to offer. In this tech-laden era it’s much more important than mere entertainment.
By DAREN STEBNER
There aren’t many things I get effusive about, so when I say that modern boardgaming is the best thing to come along since chili-lime sheep dip, people sit up and take notice. Well,… in truth the look I’m generally given is more apropos to my having suddenly sprouted a second head. This is often followed by a patronizing “Oh?” as you might humour a small child after it announces that a spaceship landed on the front lawn while you were in the bathroom.
But I am completely serious.
I regard boardgaming as the latest in social networking platforms, but with one crucial difference: It’s actually social. (I use the term “boardgaming” in this article in the broadest sense to include card and role playing games – anything played together at a table). My aim here is to convince you that boardgaming has become a formidable antidote to the vortex of social isolation tools with which we’ve become so morbidly enamoured. Why do I believe that? Because boardgames provide a simple and accessible means for creating authentic connections with other people in real life. I think that as a society we are beginning to recognize that our growing collective malaise is the result of the things that electronic friends and distractions can’t provide. After more than a decade of smart phones and the rise of Facebook and the like (pun intended), the damaging consequence has been the active unravelling of the social fabric. Compounding this, computerized technology in general has made it easy to get things done without actually having to interact with anyone at all. We now buy tickets, pay bills, bank, shop, and watch our movies online. Some of us even telecommute. But the human psyche was shaped over aeons through life in social groups. Is it any wonder that people increasingly report feeling disconnected and depressed?
What is clear from all this is that software – as much as we so obviously love it – is not a valid substitute for real human contact. It just isn’t. And boardgames with their tangibility, low barrier to entry, and implicitly social agenda have the requisite elements for directly addressing that problem.
But boardgames are boring, you say. They’re “bored” games (ho-ho) and I think I’d prefer to just sit alone in my corner here and binge-watch something on Netflix. Well let me whisper you a secret, my groggy young cub: You slept through the revolution. To disabuse you of the notion that boardgames are boring, allow me to direct you to this video by one of the hobby’s foremost personalities and critics, Quintin Smith. Quintin (AKA “Quinns”) is the founder of my favourite boardgame review site, ShutupAndSitDown.com.
Wait, what? There are boardgame critics? Yes, that part I didn’t make up. There are now boardgame critics. Lots of them. And you should take that as an indicator of how much the hobby has grown, and grown up.
Now, boardgaming is social, sure, but I’ll do you one better: It’s not only social, it’s inclusive. And in case you’re still in a post-hibernatorial fog wondering what that bright yellow ball in the sky is, social plus inclusive equals that elusive and quickly disappearing thing we call community.
If, like me, you lament the fact that you don’t know who your neighbours are and you pine for the days when sitting in front of a screen wasn’t the soul-consuming pastime it is now, then I’ve got good news for you. If you would just like to have something engaging to do with other people that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg, then I’ve got good news for you, too. Read on.
Boardgames are right now in the throes of a burgeoning Renaissance. Look around your town and take note of the number of game stores and cafes quietly popping up (hint: Google for them, they’re there). Chances are good you don’t have to go far to find one now, whereas only ten years ago they were nowhere in sight. This isn’t a fad. The hobby is catching on and growing, and I believe it’s here to stay. I see at least six good reasons for this revival:
People are coming back to boardgaming for the reasons I talked about above. Newfound community is why they’re staying.
I believe that the more boardgamers there are the healthier our society will be. Understand that it’s not the act of playing boardgames in and of itself that makes me feel this way. Rather, what I see in boardgaming is that it has the necessary ingredients for bringing people from all walks of life together – all genders, ethnicities, ages, socio-economic statuses, intellectual and physical capacities, religious leanings, sexual orientations, and whatever else you care to name. It is able to do this because a game establishes a framework for interaction between two or more people. It creates a safe space for everyone, because the rules of engagement are understood and implicitly accepted by all of the participants, and nothing but the game needs to matter while it’s in progress. At the same time, this focus by everyone on the same thing and in the same physical space lends itself unavoidably to learning about one another, subtly but surely bridging the gaps that separate us in daily life. In other words, without having to apply any additional effort or move outside of the game’s framework, players begin automatically to relate to one another, recognizing what they have in common, and minimizing their differences. Boosting that capability, co-operative games actively promote teamwork rather than competition, making working together and understanding each other a core element of the experience.
If you are sport-minded you may have noted that the above description could just as easily be applied to sports, since they also provide a framework of rules through which individuals and teams interact. This is true to an extent. However, accessibility is an important area where boardgames by far have the upper hand, particularly when you consider the financial, physical, and time demands that sports often impose. Boardgames don’t have those limiting requirements, again making them the more inclusive activity with the far larger potential for creating a diverse community. For example, a friend of mine used to regularly attend a game night with someone who was a quadriplegic. While this person did require assistance to execute the physical tasks, they were still a fully engaged and equal participant in playing the games.
Speaking to accessibility again, unlike most video games the pacing of boardgames is controlled entirely by the players. This allows the opportunity for leisurely conversation and discussion if desired. It also accommodates people without highly attuned hand-eye coordination, and those for whom games of frenetic, pressured activity aren’t appealing or approachable. Not everyone knows how to use a video game controller, whereas everyone understands the physics of the real world and the vast majority are capable of picking up and moving tokens and pieces around on a board, or holding a hand of cards.
Sometimes a boardgame simply becomes filler for breaks in a conversation. For the socially awkward or shy, the game can serve as a convenient launching point for broader conversations which might otherwise be difficult for them. An agent for creating camaraderie, players will often point out to an opponent a better move that could be made over the one they’re considering, or offer help if someone is struggling. Boardgaming is often more about gaining a deeper shared understanding of a game’s mechanics in order to enhance and better appreciate the experience than it is about besting your opponents.
Through all this interaction with different people, players learn consideration and tolerance. They learn to judge less and accept more. It’s all very civil and frequently supportive, which tends to create bonds of mutual respect if not outright friendship across diverse groups of people. Contrast this with social networking technologies and ostensibly social media, which have shown themselves to be highly adept at dividing people into self-affirming echo chambers, reinforcing the concepts of “us” and “them”, and all but destroying the potential for rational, civil discourse and for learning about one another.
While I was writing this article, my sons and I visited a local game store for a drop-in evening of Dungeons & Dragons. This was my desperate attempt to finally find something all three of us could enjoy together. They both had an interest, but I hadn’t played since I was a teenager in the early 80’s and wasn’t sure I was going to enjoy it at my current age (I’ll let you do the math). Of the eight of us at the table, most were strangers to each other, and the pair of young men sitting together at one end stood out immediately. Both of their heads were shaved in a short Mohawk style with colourfully dyed hair. Ordinarily these were people I would have had no compunction or reason to interact with, and I wasn’t sure what to make of them at first. But as we started playing, we began to interact through the game and any reservations that had been there in me rapidly melted away. We sat and played together for four hours. Adventure was had, daring rescues were made, legends were born, and we all had a raucous fun time working together to save a town and survive the baddies. During a short break I ran into one of them at the snack counter and it was a completely natural thing to strike up a conversation with him. It occurred to me later that that whole evening was proof of what I had already intuited about the community-building nature of boardgaming. Oh, did I mention it became clear early on that they were a gay couple? Nobody cared. We were all just human beings looking to connect and have a good time with other human beings, and we did that with the game gracefully doing its job of facilitating a bonding experience.
I game with people who I never would have met or interacted with in anything resembling circumstances, and many of those people have now become my friends. We’re all different, we all have our quirks and our struggles, but we’re all working together to try to increase the amount of joy in our lives. I love that this hobby is so inclusive. Once I recognized it, I found myself proud to be a part of it and eager to share it with others. The capacity that boardgaming has for allowing you to meet and enjoy the company of people who are not like you (or, more correctly, who appear to be not like you) is where I think it really shines, and why I think it could be such an important tool for rebuilding our much-needed sense of community.
If you already boardgame, and your group consists only of your family or long-time friends, then I strongly encourage you to branch out. Impose yourself on some local boardgaming groups for a broader experience. Not only will that group be into different games than yours − providing new learning opportunities and happy discoveries on both sides − but you will also be investing in, growing, and availing yourself of the benefits of community that I’ve been so eagerly describing.
If I have achieved what I set out to do − convince you that maybe it’s time to take another look at boardgaming as a worthwhile hobby and pastime − I’ll be very happy indeed. It’s not an exaggeration to say that boardgaming – or, rather, the boardgaming community – has changed my life. I feel like I’ve been saved in a way. It’s no coincidence that at a time when the social fabric lies in tatters, the scientific literature is littered with research highlighting the critical importance of having strong social and community bonds both for emotional and physical well-being. And the physical health benefit isn’t solely related to being involved in physical activities, no. Physical health is literally improved just by being engaged socially with other people – the mind affects the body. As well, of course, belonging to a community combats feelings of loneliness and isolation, reduces the occurrence of depression, and speeds recovery when it does happen. None of these positive benefits can be reaped merely by having a collection of friends on an electronic social media platform.
Whether that information makes you stop and think or not, the real upshot is simply this: If you can increase your engagement in a real life community by even a small extent you’ll be a happier person, full stop. That’s irrefutable. And who wouldn’t like to be happier?
As an introvert I didn’t have anything resembling a social life, nor a social network that I felt like I could lean on when I needed to. Even my kids were worried about me and how I would end up – some poor old hermit with no friends and a sad pointless life, waiting for my time to shuffle off. It’s not like I was ever bored. I thought I was happy, because I had lots of hobbies and interests to keep my mind engaged. They were like a warm blanket on a snowy day. But after a full day of indulging myself – and especially as evening set in – I’d often look up and suddenly feel deflated and empty. What was that all for? If I die tomorrow, what will this matter? That sinking feeling was my cherished aloneness transforming into the far less welcome loneliness. I was beginning to understand what my former fiancée meant when she said I spent too much time inside my own head.
Maybe my situation was a little unique, but I suspect not. Maybe you recognize echoes of your own life in mine and are struggling to cultivate some semblance of belonging and connection, but can’t quite figure out how to do it. Fortunately I was able to find others that shared my unrequited interest in boardgaming. It took some sleuthing and some stepping out of my comfort zone, but I’m happy to say it has paid off in spades. Now I know I’m not ever going to become that sad, lonely old man.
There are a lot of people out there (admit it, maybe you) who have been living in an ever-shrinking personal world and who could do with some re-connection to other members of their species, building bridges instead of walls. At my boardgaming meetups I’m always thrilled to see a new face – somebody who’s realized what they’re missing and have taken the leap to try and find it here. I always do my best to provide a warm welcome and a handshake, sometimes hosting or teaching a game or two in order to help them feel comfortable. It’s one of the ways I contribute to and participate in my newfound community. More than once during a meetup I’ve heard the words “I’ve found my people!” The joy and the relief expressed in that outburst is palpable, and it makes me so happy every time it happens. I know that feeling. That’s one more person who has found a place they belong, and that is truly a good thing for all of us.
But after all of this, what it really comes down to for each and every one of us is a choice. What kind of a world do you want to live in? The modern convenience of doing your banking and paying your bills online is wonderful, yes, but make no mistake it comes with a high cost and we are all suffering for it. If we want to keep our tech but preserve our humanity, then we need to engage in alternative ways to build community that replace the ways that are being so rapidly extinguished. We must have compelling reasons to interact with all manner of people in person in order to build those cross-group connections that make a community whole rather than divided. Boardgaming, in my opinion, is a surprisingly powerful enabler for weaving those kinds of connections. If you don’t already have something that connects you to a real community, then boardgaming may well be your gateway to a more fulfilling and meaningful life. Don’t hesitate to take your first steps toward it.
You may now be wondering how to get your feet wet. The next article will be dedicated to assisting you in breaking into the hobby with the greatest chance of an enjoyable initial experience so that you’ll want to continue exploring it. Happy boardgaming!